12 Rules For M.A.D. (“Miracles A Dozen”) Recovery: Epilogue & Links


Epilogue: Now that you have done all that, & much more, you will finally be able to give yourself the Love you have always deserved, but just never seemed to get the right encouragement to in our sadly disenchanted society. Love yourself with all your heart. Always remember, external things can never mean more to you as your own intrinsic organs & very substance, which is itself the pre-requisite for any other kind of love or enjoyment, even though as you grow older you will inevitably begin to die off & sacrifice yourself for something outside of yourself; — romantic love especially being how we pass on & re-affirm what we are & yet work for something beyond ourselves at the same time. You are always your greatest gift. 

These rules were taken from my much longer book, pictured above, which should now be available at your local Amazon store. Please support my work so that I can keep on helping others as much as possible, especially if you have enjoyed the above.

12 Rules For M.A.D. (“Miracles A Dozen”) Recovery: Rule 10

Express yourself thru’ garbled poetry when things are too painful even to see clearly.

Sometimes when one is very unwell, the mind no longer follows the legislative Ego. As I said above, one is an out-of-control machine responding to a threat that is no longer present, except for in the mind. At such times, it is not really possible to form definite, solid opinions & rules an act on them. But, in order to even begin to work towards doing so, it can be very helpful to start beginning to express oneself more. In poetry, as opposed to a prose treatise, one merely presents a possible, proposed view of things, based upon one’s subjective, tentative take upon it, letting the opinions & feelings stand in their own dignity, which is precisely what is needed for someone whose mind is very clouded & unable to run in exact accord with an objective reality. In doing this, hopefully if there are any kind people around you, you will get some attention for one’s efforts, which will boost one’s self-esteem somewhat & give others to understand you in a more sensitive light, as someone who feels & has an inner world that deserves & requires taking care of. That in turn will buttress one’s sense of self further, towards the re-attainment of a strong, stable Ego which is able to assert itself objectively again, i.e. True health. Poetry can be a kind of cry to the world, & plea to be viewed a real person, whose thoughts & feelings matter. In a world in which this kind of personal respect for people, especially young people, is becoming increasingly endangered & rare, poetry is perhaps the best antidote imaginable. When you read a poem, you instinctively feel you are being taken into the innermost reaches of a person’s soul, with the reverence that that demands. If that experience is not held as holy & revered by our society, there is little hope left for any of us. If one’s innermost, careful thoughts & words don’t matter, what possibly can matter? As Nietzsche said, ‘the world revolves inaudiably’; it revolves around thoughts. If we cease to pay attention to our thoughts, the pivot of all action &, in the time when technology has conquered Nature, the pivot of all material reality, then everything will fall to pieces. Express yourself thru’ garbled poetry when things are too painful even to see clearly.

12 Rules For M.A.D. (“Miracles A Doxen”) Recovery: Rule 9

Build a framework of core values and belief in your own mind and endeavour to live by them.

Human beings just love their beliefs. Yes they do. Nowadays, we tend to be made to feel guilty for having any real beliefs, or have done, since the gospel of ‘relatavism’. The emphasis on the insistence that ‘everyone has a right an opinion’, & that somehow all opinions are equally ‘valid’. This is really the death of opinion, & with it the death of the human soul. Because an opinion which someone is not able to hold forth as ‘the right’ opinion, they do not really have the courage to even fully assert. It is just a collection of words they bandy about, giving them no real grip on reality or confidence in themselves & their own moral quest. This is not at all ‘moral’; it is just weakness & leaving oneself prey to be dominated by others, by those evil enough to keep you fooled in this way. Building a framework of core values, in which one truly believes, i.e. which stem from an honest assessment of reality, & are in touch with one’s own inner conscience & feeling, rather than just rationalizations & justifications of one’s behavior handed down from on high… is one of the most empowering things that a person can ever do, & will forever give them pride & dignity amongst their fellows & all life’s challenges. Most mental illness, especially among the young, stems from personal insecurity & doubt, a feeling that one doesn’t even really have the right to exist. If one can align oneself with the True & the Good (as Jordan Peterson says), that is an absolutely fantastic & almost bullet-proof antidote to that most essential malady which can turn a mouse into a lion over a period of a few weeks. The most essential thing is to justify one’s own existence, and true ‘self-worth’ is not achieved by the flattery of others; its rather achieved by becoming immune to the opinions of others by deciding to become an active agent for Good. Furthermore, the ability to justify oneself intellectually & morally to one’s fellows is just about the most powerful tool for success in the whole world. Even most Presidents can’t do it, but if you can do it better, you can be President if you want; because being President is all about making others believe in oneself by the power of argument & the word. If you can follow your own own rules & logic in action as well, that will give you Character; a permenant feeling of solidity, achievement & effectiveness in action that radiates from your innermost being to all those around you. It is also very helpful to try to delineate between those beliefs that are real, & really govern one’s actions, & those which are just for social display & don’t really play an active part in own’s behavior at all & simply clog up the system. So occasionally try to root out the latter a little or be more honest or clear-minded about one’s own deceptions &/or padding. As Jordan Peterson says, lots of so-called ‘atheists’ still believe in God at some level, but that is just one obvious example. On the other hand, lots of ‘Christians’ don’t actually apply their so-called faith to their life at all. Such ideas are often more like fixations that confuse the mind, & obsess precisely because they are so confusing & ‘mysterious’, rather than solid beliefs of any real worth. Take the idea that ‘Jesus died on the Cross for my sins & I am saved from Hellfire by believing in Him’ – this is to a considerable extent just a piece of tomfoolery that obsesses & captivates precisely due to its incomprehensibility. To people with no proper intellectual training, nonsensical ideas appeal because they seem precisely the most difficult ones to refute – if you can’t even understand clearly what you’re saying, & no one else can either, as well as having absolutely no basis in experience, that evasiveness makes them seem almost impossible to refute, especially to non-philosophers. Like all madness, it can be quite intimidating to others & gives the appearance of being deep, in the ‘lets not even go there’ kind of sense. That can be handy too though. For instance, being considered too clear a thinker can itself be dangerous; remember, the ‘fool’ retains the element of surprise & chance of being under-estimated. Finally, one of the most important things to bear in mind (may sound hilarious coming from me! — but shouldn’t, so much anyway) is consistency, or rather, harmony & integrity in one’s beliefs, actions, values & character traits. What will work for one person, will not always, in fact rarely work for others, because in others it will be merely grafted on artificially, & be out of place & ungainly in the new context of the other person’s traits, undermining both them & the new attempt at adaptation. Attaining to Ultimate, Universal values requires much more abstraction than most peeps are willing or capable of, so usually its best for most people not even to attempt it – otherwise you get stupid, intolerant religious (including secular, pseudo-religious, of course.. I always use the word ‘religious’ in a wider sense) dogma & strictures inflicted on everyone, which do not belong to & are totally out of place on most of the people they are inflicted upon.

(A relevant out-take from previous section of this book: Learn to allow for and tolerate exceptions. Every rule has its opposite exception. The task of education is not to just teach the rules, but — even more crucially – how to identify the exceptions…since these ‘exceptions’ are very often the strongest and most valuable instances.)

Build a framework of core values and belief in your own mind and endeavour to live by them.

12 Rules For M.A.D. (“Miracles A Dozen”) Recovery: Rule 8

Recognize the ability for and embrace change (express and evaluate the axioms of behavior and belief that have carried you this far)

It is necessary to embrace both the past & the future. Clearly, for someone whose mood is perpetually very low, much change is needed. Therefore, the first thing is simply to focus on this most fundamental fact, and allow it to happen. As has often been said, unhappiness and absence of change is usually the result of some kind of emotional resistance or other. Also simply not realizing that it is possible, i.e. Viewing oneself as one has been told one is by others, as a fixed, known quantity & ‘essence’. As we grow up, our parents, teachers, Dr.s etc, place various labels upon us, which we erroneously, in our innocence, take to be something deep, when in fact they are just meaningless words that have nothing to do with what we really are. It is crucial to comprehend that, at bottom, we are not ‘schizophrenic’, ‘depressed’, bipolar’, ‘ADHD’, etc., etc., etc…. at bottom, we are merely energy, & we can manifest in almost anyway we like, & we are defined simply by how we manifest, in the phenomenon that we make up from moment to moment, not according to some ‘essence’ that we don’t properly understand but that is supposed to be revealed to us in the words that other people put upon us. Again, as I have said earlier in this book, a phenomenological approach to ourselves & the world is the beginning of wisdom; simply observing phenomenon, ‘the surface’, & recognizing that that is perhaps the most important thing. Inattention to the surface, to the phenomenon itself, & prioritization of the opinions of ‘experts’ over it seems to be the root of much, perhaps most, ignorance & suffering, especially of younger people. Once we begin to pay attention to the actual phenomenon itself, to what is, according to a more Heideggerian method, we can soon begin to work on it & change it for the better, & sift the truly real from the fabricating lies. There is in fact, in some sense, an underlying nature different from the surface as it appears to others, (hence why the behaviorists are so wrong-headed), but that nature is more akin to a realm of untapped possibility & freedom, thru’ judicious use of the imagination & learning to rationalize one’s existence more, rather than a realm of terrible circumscribed limitation as supposedly revealed by psychiatric diagnosis. (In this sense, the LGBTQ community have some truth to their position, in that freedom is at least as essential to our nature – to human nature – as even our sexual nature, so the ability to define or create one’s own sexual orientation/ gender is in many respects a legitimate part of that. But if we can define & create our very sex, surely we should at least be able to define & create our own personality as well, which by definition is largely a product of & co-extensive with our own long series of decisions, (i.e. at least partly willful actions ) without being unduly limited by psuedo- medical quackery ‘diagnoses’!) When one becomes very mentally ill, due to heavy external pressure, one becomes like a machine obeying certain rules that one doesn’t understand. One is constantly panicking, & acting in such a way as to supposedly avoid the potential threat, even if the actual threatening object has been largely removed & now only exists in one’s imagination. I imagine this might be called PTSD (Post-traumatic-stress-disorder), or a form of it. It is what psychiatry caused me to have for 12 whole years. The way that I eventually solved & dealt with it was by an immensely difficult, laborious, & slow process of defining what the heck I was doing & learning to re-imagine alternatives, i.e. Elaborating the ‘axioms’ on which my machine-like action was running. In general, it is only by making explicit our own assumptions that we can begin to revise them & change them for the better, so this is an absolutely crucial part of improving one’s mental health. For example, a person who has always been depressed, or been depressed for a very long time, may simply assume ‘this is how life is’. In order to begin to heal, the first thing they have to do is begin to question that assumption and entertain the possibility that life can be immensely joyful. Another example would be someone who believed or who had got into the habit that the opposite sex was just for sex, & that the possibility of finding a real soul mate or emotional union did not exist. Until they address this fundamental assumption that has somehow protruded into their consciousness due to our vulgar popular culture, their relations with the opposite sex (& their sex life) are always going to be extremely limited compared to the potentially sublime feelings of love & deeper relief of which human beings are eminently capable, but often suppress. There are many other common examples which it could be very beneficial to go into, but probably far too many; so always question your assumptions, & try to work out what they might be, & how they might be limiting you unnecessarily. Recognize the ability for and embrace change (express and evaluate the axioms of behavior and belief that have carried you this far)

Intermission: On The Notion Of “Effort” As a Virtue For Life

Intermission: On The Notion Of ‘Effort’ As A Virtue For Life (& The Relative Superior Merits Of Technique) A small child is banging his head against a brick wall. The wise father watches on, his formidable brow locked Into a deep frown. After a long, irritated silence, In which nothing could be heard but the banging of a child’s Head against a wall, The reverent man finally exclaims: ‘You’re never going to succeed like that. You have to bang Your head alot harder against that wall if you want to find out What’s on the other side!’ Meanwhile, a cat who had been Preening himself lazily in the sunshine, eyes the couple warily, And then slinks nonchalantly around the side of the wall.

12 Rules For M.A.D. (“Miracles A Dozen”) Recovery: Rule 6

When things start to go wrong in our lives, it may sometimes be worth pondering why they weren’t so bad earlier; or, rather than simply despairing of ourselves and repudiating our whole past, once we realize how awry we have already gone, & are only just beginning to realize it, it is well worth refraining from despair & trying hard to see the good in ourselves & our past up until now. This can stave off a lot of selfdestructive behavior & self-hatred that periods of transition & growth are often accompanied by. When one falls into downward spiral, getting labelled ‘mentally ill’, it can be extremely valuable to recapitulate one’s former strengths, rather than looking to move forward at a time when one’s strength is very low & new things are very difficult. Mental Health professionals constantly tell us to look outside of ourselves for answers; to go out more, & listen to what they have to say; to take their ‘medication’. But, in my experience, real lasting health occurs primarily through seeing the good that is already inside oneself, & learning to love and take care of it better, to build on it further. If you don’t have any good inside of you, its not clear to me that anything else is going to help much. But we all have good inside of ourselves, which is why we are still alive, as the Universe constantly separates the wheat from the chaff, keeping only what is still ripe for existence. Very often, for some reason as we get older, particularly in our teens, we tend to forget a lot of things, a lot of the things that kept & made us strong earlier. This is often related to the sense of nihilism, of not knowing what to do with our lives, that often sets in around this age. It is therefore extremely important & valuable to fight this dangerous tendency, & think back to all the virtues that we manifested, barely even realizing it, to cope with the jungle of the playground & the frightening, confusing world around us when we very little. On leaving school, one often feels that one has spent many years in docile obedience, putting great effort, & for what? But instead of scorning this great effort we put in totally, we should look upon it in admiration, & as a sign of what we might achieve if such effort were applied intelligently to our own ends, rather than that of our bullying school masters & anxious, old-fashioned parents. Children can also often be quite kind & gentle, then when we get older we sometimes scorn this attitude, since it has caused others to view us as weak & not gotten us very far; this too is a mistake, because it is precisely the kindness of childhood that when combined with the dominating strength of adulthood can work miracles of success, that cruelty & harshness merely sabotage. The kindness of childhood only worked such little effect because we weren’t big & intimidating enough to stand up for ourselves at the same time & gain the respect we deserved; even then, it may often have protected us & made adults take more kindly upon us at times, rather than garnering a bad reputation early on. Recapitulate and build on your former strengths.

12 Rules For M.A.D. (“Miracles Dozen”) Recovery: Rule 3

There is a terribly poisonous notions nowadays that pleasure & health are somehow at odds. There is really still an inherited notion, from Chistianity, that pleasure itself is sinful that wreaks absolute disaster on all, especially the young. People are afraid to enjoy themselves, & they don’t realize that pleasure is the body’s natural way of guiding you towards what is most healthy & beneficial. The main reason this does not seem so, is due to the imagined sinful nature of pleasure itself, combined with the unhealthy habits in which children are raised. For instance, the reason that children will go for fizzy, sugary drinks, is not because these drinks are more pleasant in themselves. Its more a combination of self-hatred, based upon parental neglect/ absence of love, & the fact that is what they are acclimatized to from early on – its what their parents give them. They then do not realize their preference is merely due to acclimatization due to the way in which society wrongly persuades children (& adults) that their identity is much more fixed than it is, & that their instincts & tastes cannot be developed. It also seems ‘uncool’, meaning, in other words, that is seems like sign of weakness to actually care for yourself by admitting you made bad choices in the past & choosing healthier options. In other words, as I said, it is almost entirely due to a lack of love. If we make war with our tastes & instincts, they may never develop, & we will be at constant war with ourselves & thus our vitality & potential enormously stimyied. It is quite possible – normal in fact – for pleasure and health to be in100% harmony. It is merely a question of being kind to ourselves, & altering our habits gradually in such a way that the capacity for pleasure in them is developed. But if we see healthy things as a punishment, something we have to make a big effort at, that pleasure will never develop, because the way we see things itself determines how they manifest, psychologically at least. Most of the time, it is in reality much more healthy to stop tormenting oneself than it is unhealthy to simply continue with ‘unhealthy things’, if doing healthy things seems such a great effort; because stress & effort & inner conflict are intrinsically draining to our health & strength, & could & must be used for real tasks in the world rather than ‘looking after our health’! Leisure, & ease of functioning are the sin qua non of true health & spirituality, as all good rulers & artists know; there is nothing healthier than just having time for relaxation, for ‘doing nothing’, & just letting oneself become like a galvanizing lightening rod held up in air, or net collecting butterflies, a shelf collecting beautiful dust, ready to be struct by whatever thoughts & inspiration naturally occurs, rather than going to too much effort to make it happen, which is often the most self-defeating thing you can do. I believe that the truth of the matter here goes back to my previous rule, too: that people fail by attempting to do things too rapidly, turning it into self-defeating chore. It is also important to know that all the nonsense cooked up by Dr.s & nutritionalists is actually nonsense. Unless you feel palpably healthier & better as a result of on their suggestions (& do try to be aware of the placebo effect in your assessment), then please don’t even give those materialistic pipsqueaks advice a second glance. There are so many really great health foods, but the Gold Standard is simply how you feel over the course of the days & weeks (usually the very day or moment you consume them) ; not talk of ‘clogged arteries’ & other bog-standard drivel. The stress their fear-mongering creates is far worse for you than anything. If you invest power in things outside of yourself, outside of your own mind/body, that will inevitably only tend to make you weaker, so you should always work towards the opposite; towards greater self-sufficiency and selfreliance. & any dependency is largely a psychological dependency. The same, of course, applies with all the sexual mores & guidelines handed down by society. Sexuality is a natural blessing & source of joy – the only thing that can soil it is the human mind. The usual outcries are therefore almost entirely imaginary, hysterical & without moral basis but popular insanity, destructive vanity, envy against those are getting more of it than you are, or sheer delight in cruelty under the guise of morality. Perhaps see the great Wilhelm Reich’s work for what health looks like on this matter. As Wilhelm Reich knew, all health, of both mind & body, stems from balancing & fostering the right type of personal energy (i.e. Energy flow around the body, & to some extent also one’s environment). Feeling & emotion is itself, & should be, a condensed form of Reason. Learn to trust one’s feelings, & recognize how they are nearly always organically related to one’s reasonings or deeper knowledge. Learn to tune them, by gradually listening to & cultivating them, until you can trust them. Reconnect with your instincts.